are you still at the devil's house?
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
