im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
