M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
