..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
