when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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