don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
