I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
