I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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