I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
