And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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