the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
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