Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
