One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Randomize
