u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
