who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
