Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
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