Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Damn victory sex feels great
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
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