I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
