i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
