His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
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