Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
