Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
