She is in my trunk
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
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