Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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