i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
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