just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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