Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
