i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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