And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
