I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
