I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize