No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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