Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
