It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
