She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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