She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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