They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
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