marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...