You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
please come you make the beer taste better
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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