He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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