so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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