Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
