Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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