I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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