i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
