doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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