just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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