What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
