One girl and one boy is just not enough.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
