I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
You ate ashes out of my bong
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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