I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
