honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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