Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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