dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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